Joy the Senior

I'ts crazyyyyyyyyyy! i'm a senior in high school, approaching second semester, applying to colleges, getting ready for life beyond this home. I feel so incredibly blessed. I feel so humbled that God has watched over me these years, sent me struggle sent me relief, and walked with me to this point in my life. I feel so blessed.

I forgot all about my lovely blogs, haha. I guess coincidence brought me back here though because I was assigned a blog project for my facing history course and when i logged in i saw my long forgotten blogs waiting for me in the dashboard. Haha! How coincidental

I haven't even looked at my last post on this but it must've been a whileeee ago. I just wanted to update i guess, even though i have a shit ton of other things to get finished tonight lol. I'm blasting If I Lose Myself by OneRepublic and it's just perfect. When in doubt, OneRepublic is always a solid choice to go back to haha

Well, tonight my college apps go out! And then i must patiently wait.....SO NERVOUS AHHHH ahhahahaha (: i'm applying to Penn State as my top choice, Northeastern University, UMass-Amherst, Pace University, Providence College, Suffolk University, Temple University, University of Tampa, University of Illinois at chicago, and Arizona State.

God willing i will get into college!! haha and then even more God willing i will get some financial aid por diosss que nerviosa yo estoy -___- i'm so excited though :) it makes me want to cry tears of joy i just can't believe my life. i feel so blessed. i feel so small. i feel so honored. I just want to thank you Lord for everything. You know more than anyone, the truth of what my life is right now and has been and even where i'm going and you love me anyways as if i were a perfect child. i feel so blessed. i feel so beautiful.....i feel as if i have a purpose. and i haven't felt that way in so long. i feel like i've been found after being lost for so long. i don't know how to describe it....i just feel like i am worth more than my mistakes. i feel redeemed. and i don't feel ashamed. i don't feel guilty. i want to apologize and repent for all my sins and mistakes, but i don't feel shame....i feel like the weight of my shame has been lifted and i can rejoice

praise the Lord! Your unconditional love has me stopped in awe praise the Lord

xoxo,
Joy

3. thoughtfulness

One thing I like about myself (and i'm not trying to be vain) is my ability to be thoughtful.
The reason i'm writing about this 'joy' right now is because I've been getting really excited about Christmas :P haha already! I really like getting people presents, and i like even more when someone loves the present i give them. (does that sound a little vain?) haha :)

Well, when I really put my mind to something, I can come up with the most thoughtful things to do. And in this case, the most thoughtful presents to give.
I'M SO EXCITED to have my family open their presents because so much time and effort went into their gifts. ^_^

On the flip side, I love it when someone else does something really thoughtful for me. Those moments are really great :) No one can deny that heart-mushing (when your heart turns into mush) moment when someone makes you feel like the most important person in the world.

To make people happy is one of the greatest powers we have.

My favorite thoughtful things to do:
-give Christmas presents
-plan birthday dinners/parties/outings
-write spontaneous letters

My favorite thoughtful things to receive:
-birthday presents
-phone calls
-spontaneous letters

2. great people in my life :)

shout out to everyone in my life: I LOVE YOU GUYS. ^_^


really, i don't know what i'd do without such great people in my life. such a huge bundle of blessings from God =3


i love everyone....well, i mean sometimes it feels like that :) tehe it's kind of weird for me to feel like this, just because i'm not used to it yet. but it feels more natural than being bitter and hating on everyone. it's a lot less stressful, too :P tangent: STRESS;;;; i have so many gray hairs, it's unsettling. i'll be straightening my hair and spot like 3......that must mean i have a lot, if i can spot them on my own head.... :/ oh well. man invented hair dye for this very reason :D


well back to the awesome people in my life :)
what makes them so great??????? i mean, some of the people i'm talking about are ones who i used to utterly utterly despise before...so there must be only one answer; because of God's wonderful love can i now love them, toooo. God has always loved me, more than i can imagine, and He's always loved my brothers and sisters in Christ just as much, but I wondered a lot why I didn't feel this way for them before....i grew up [am growing up :P] going to church every Sunday, and it's kind of drilled into you; "God loves you." You can hear that a hundred times, but it doesn't make much of a difference until God helps you to see what that really means. tangent: YAYYYYYYY ^_^ yay for God being so awesome!


My DR testimony is all about love; God showing me love on that missions trip, and showing me love while preparing for it. Tangent: If you want to read my testimony, I'll post it up on my other blog http://www.vivaadios.blogspot.com when i'm done with the journal entries - cause everything has to go in chronological order for maximum effect :P  I began seeing how much God loved my missions team, how much He loved the people in DR, and how much He loved me. Cause that's really important, too - realizing that God loves you a WHOLE lot....more than you could comprehend. But not only did the missions trip help bring about such an incredible change in my heart, i think having the missions trip + the retreat like a double pow wow combo back-to-back really helped me grow, being away from school and being farther away from the many many distractions school has.


So, i'm super super super happy that a love seed is finally growing in my heart :) Hating people feels unnatural, and in the end is more detrimental to yourself than others....or at least it was for me. Love is what we need to spread ^_^ I especially like spreading love by writing people really really really long long long letters :D i'm trying to get them around to my youth group, people i care about, everyone? ..eventually :) but i'm trying to be creative also and branching out into different stuff...i can bake for you? i can draw you a picture? i can talk to you? i can listen.


and all i do is because i love the Lord, and i love you.


-Joy =)

1. yummy food

whenever i go over to my sister E's house, i never stop eating. the food is just so good, whether it's E making it or my lovely grandma. It being april break and all, and also having had spent the last 2 days living on pb and j crackers has made me appreciate good food all the more. Plus, my mom is not the best cook nor chooses to cook often so I'm usually eating my own trial and errors during the week, and then eating like a queen on the weekends when i get to see my sis. 


Although i do complain a lot during the week about not having anything good to eat, i'm truly lucky that I'm still not completely without it. 



Mmmmmmmm, the joys of yummy food.